5/11/2023

To my subscribers and friends:

First, I want to say thank you for taking interest in my thoughts and words, and for subscribing. It means the world to me.

It’s been a while since I’ve posted here, and for good reason. The last couple of years have been a tad tumultuous, with some literal upheaval, impactful change, the loss of many dear friends and family members who’ve sailed on to the next stop on the soul’s journey beyond this world, and then, just busy with life and work in between. 

But this is how life works, doesn’t it. It’s all in how we navigate the choppy seas of change that defines it. I’ve come out ok, having grown tremendously in many ways. To be brief, following my mom’s 90^th birthday, her health and well-being became compromised in the normal course of aging, and there were moments when she thought she would leave us as well. Mom was moved to an assisted living residence, and the task of closing our family home of 47 years came to the fore. For months, I weeded through a personal treasure trove of memories that extended to my formative years. My mom saved everything. I literally mean EVERTHING. Not like a packrat – she had everything remarkably organized. But man, I found things like: the original purchase receipt for my childhood refrigerator from 1954; the cowboy woolen blankets my brothers and I used as kids on our bunkbeds; birthday and Christmas cards from to and from my mom and dad; anniversary cards, and so on, and so on, and…photos. LOTS of photos. Perhaps in coming posts I’ll share some of the stories about one wee treasure or another, because each item indeed had a story. And I recalled most of them. 

There were moments, as I went through things, where I could only sit and weep with great love over one evoked memory that was previously forgotten. Of good times past, of family friends, neighbors and family that left us long ago, of times that will be no more. In the midst of this, I would periodically pause to compose my thoughts in notes to my brothers, and in some poetic compositions. I’ll leave you with this one that I think summarizes it best, because I think all of us have or will experience the same at one point or another. 

September, 2021

As I pack away my mother’s home

NAMASTE TO THE NEIGHBORHOOD WAY

~

Most of what I knew is gone.

The faces, names and folks of olde,

have lain to rest or moved along.

The places where I went are razed,

repurposed for another reason,

or redefined another way.

~

Ghosts of moments from childhood days,

of passing smiles and friendly ways,

flit throughout that sacred chamber

where I hold things dear, 

as if those moments 

are yet still near…

~

What I knew is gone for good,

and only few know what that’s been.

No one else to share the joy,

of a family friend who gave their love,

of a distant relative’s gesture fair,

a pat on the back or tussle of hair.

~

Faded scenes of a distant time, 

when life was new and youth was mine.

When the sun seemed brighter

and air seemed clean,

when people seemed kinder

on streets not yet mean.

~

In naivete I did embrace,

a view that all was is as is,

that naught would change

as older we’d grow,

as we went about our daily biz.

~

That camaraderie and times we knew

and the way things were

and things we’d do,

would remain in stasis,

a captured embodiment,

of status quo.

~

Yet the clock did tick

and the chariot came,

to take away our dearest and those we love,

checked off from a list of photos and names.

Once they sat, or stood, and spoke right there,

then just-like-that they are no more.

Their voices quelled by the end bell’s toll,

their bodies transformed to buried ash,

their spirits that danced on tongues of song,

have all passed on to the realm

where what we’ve known,

is now long gone.

~

Christmas moments

and birthdays too,

family outings on a beach afar

TV specials, a walk to a bar,

bread and lunchmeat trips down the street,

a gallon of milk or soda-pop treat.

~

Around the corner to a neighboring home,

or a block nearby, like the stone that is thrown.

A drive to the market, 

a ride to a game,

A bus to the city

or the shore via train.

~

And along the way

we’d meet someone new,

a face with a voice

and a name we not knew.

I’m sure they’ve passed

to that place in the sky,

never knowing how their kindness touched,

while so unconscious and on the fly.

~

But I’ve remembered their faces,

and remembered the names,

always recalling

the love which they gave.

Now that they’re gone,

my heart fills with tears,

my eyes – a pond, reflecting the years.

~

Those places and folks and things that I knew,

are really gone,

are really gone, 

so long, so long.

~

I feel grateful for all the love,

to have known these things

as part of my own.

Living on in memory, in that sacred place

where things are held dear,

where what seems now so distant and far,

remains in the heart, forever near.

~

DNA is gleaned from dust balls,

and riches from the rubbage.

Finding treasure in the trash,

measuring for value yet retained,

and exchange the rest for cash.

~

The days of youth are gone for good,

ne’er to pass this way again. 

From the generations that went before,

into our lives came those souls whom we knew,

sharing wisdom passed down from olde,

giving all their best to guide us through.

The black and white now fades to grey,

the Kodachrome to yellow.

The clock that once would be rewound,

has ceased to tock has ceased to tick,

at a forgotten hour

from long ago.

~

Farewell, my loved ones,

Goodbye, my friends,

and Namaste to the neighborhood way.

The ways of our elders

have given the ghost,

from an era and age that offered the most.

~

With a promise of fortune,

prosperity, and cheer,

all that was offered is no longer proffered.

What was available then,

with scant to be found in the now or the when,

wafts like steam to an unseen beyond,

no longer here,

no longer bound.

It’s really gone,

really gone,

so long, so long.